Revenge of the coffee blogging.

I think this will be my last Kalamazoo-based coffee blog; I'm moving soon, and I've got a good idea of the coffee shops in this town.

Ironically, this is not a true coffee blog; I am at Starbucks (a fitting coda to this movement), arguably the biggest purveyor of caffeine in the world (does anyone know how to stack them up against Coca-Cola?), and I cannot get on their wireless network. It is run by T-Mobile, the cell phone service provider, and you need to be a T-Mobile customer to use their network. Not a customer? No problem, they say! Just pay ten bucks for a day's use of any of their wireless networks. So customerhood is inevitable for users.

I'm drinking something called an "Orange Mocha", which purports to be "Tall". I know I'm not the first person to make fun of Starbucks' alternative size-name scheme, and I know that it makes a hell of a lot more sense than the fast-food move a few years back (in which they had "Medium", "Large", and "Extra-Large", but nowhere could you get a "Small" anything), but still. This coffee is not tall. I am tall. Redwoods are tall. The Empire State Building and the Sears Tower are very fucking tall. My coffee is short. This is even contextual; compared to other coffees offered here, this is a short coffee. I must admit, though, that it is very good. It's like a liquid Chocolate Orange (and if you don't know what that is like, I pity you. It is at least two forms of therapy wrapped in foil.) I guess liquid sort of defeats the structural purpose of the Orange, but it still tastes damn good.

Well, time to pack up and find a network that I can actually use, so I can present to you my intelligent and pithy comments.